Strand-ed

Went to the Strand bookstore. 18 miles of books – this is supposed to be impressive. But Coco proved they were understating their case. He took a book off the shelf and arranged the pages so that one book alone spread out over about 27 yards. (I’m kidding. Strand people, keep your hands off of Coco.)
But I did see a couple racks (of books – get your minds out of the gutter) that had the heading “Oversize History.”
This country is taking its obesity obsession a bit too far, I think.
But wouldn’t that be something? A book on oversize history, illustrated by Botero? I smell another book project that might not come to fruition.
Mental note: find illustrator and time. Subdivide into oversized bodies and oversized egos.
Or, better yet, make it all BS and just supersize the actors. I.e., Washington crossing the Delaware was such a big deal because the boat almost capsized five times, etc. I’m just thinking aloud here, feel free to add your ideas and requests for characters not to be ignored.
Julie, for example, might want Russian history rewritten. The Russian Revolution happened because Anastasia was put into hiding. Nicholas and Alexandra were ashamed of her size and stashed her in some pre-gulag weight-loss center. The peasants thought she should be proud to be her size and wanted her freed. Lenin was a shill.
Or maybe Marie Antoinette’s “let them eat cake” was a prescient self-help tool, way before its time, about an equality of the soul, and the French peasants preferred to have aristocratic ideals of ascetic deportment and bulimic execution. Just an idea. A sketch. Let me think it over.
Ideas welcome.