Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Oh, noooo!

Today's NYTimes notes that New York is banning trans fats in restaurants.
That's discrimination, I'm sure. First snooty maitre d's stopped seating them, now this.
Can't we have a trial period of separate trans fats sections first? (I can imagine it working really well on airplanes. I'm guessing they'd fly lopsided if that happened.) Do trans fats eaters have to go outside for their fix?
Do donut shops count as restaurants? That would hurt business, I guess. Places like McDonald's might look for a loophole in saying that, well, technically they're not really restaurants any more than a vending machine is. (At least a vending machine is more likely to get your order right and return exact change.)
I should start stocking up on my trans fats now to sell them on the clandestine market later.
Wait a second. Turns out I'm already stocking up on trans fats. The only question is, how do I package them after I've lyposuctioned them off?

1 comment:

Trent said...

Good stuff! That from the act? It should be! We had a college "get-to-know-you" game where we had to name our favorite restaurant from our home towns. I said "Mister Donut"--in a totally honest and non-ironic way. It really was my favorite place. To this day, I have an old college friend who brings that up whenever I see him. Miss you guys.