Sallie Mae (for the international readers: she is - they are - primarily known for student loans in the U.S.) is in the process of being bought out by a couple private investors and two banks.
What'll the new name be? Uncle Fester? Hannibal? Vlad the Impaler? Oprah?
The new payment schedule is more straightforward, though.
For a B.A. - firstborn child.
For a Master's degree - kidney and liver.
Ph.D. - your soul.